One Month Without Cigarettes and I Feel....Lousy
Three days before Christmas and I was in the dizzy, achy, shivery beginning stages of the worst flu I have had in years. This one was for the books! I had a fever for six days straight, then again for about three more days. It ruined my entire holiday from work and really put a damper on any plans the kids had thought up for what to do with their time off from school.
Another thing it did, was completely obliterate any urge I had to smoke. OK, well not completely. I wanted to smoke, but I just knew it would either make me cough or make me sick, or make me cough so much that I would get sick. So for my entire vacation from work I didn't smoke. six days, no smoking, sick as a dog.
In the past, those first two weeks were the hardest part of quitting. I was half way through that period of time and I was still suffering a nasty cough. I pushed through on the idea that I might or might not quit if I made it through the two weeks, but I was going to get through them so I could get better. I kept my cigarettes. There was no decision or grand gesture of being finished with smoking. In fact it has been a month now and I still have a pack in my car and a pain my rain coat pocket.
This week (Week 5) has been the worst part. I am to the point that only people who quit smoking can fully relate to. I am currently disgusted by the smell of smoke on other people and the only way I can imagine to help that is to smoke, so I won't smell it anymore. This urge is stronger than the nicotine cravings for me. My husband smokes and when he comes in from the garage I want to leave the room. If he wants to kiss me, I want him to brush his teeth. I am tempted to put a bottle of mouthwash right next to the door. I can tell you who smokes as I pass them in the grocery store.
I expect all of this to pass and my hypersensitivity to the smell to ease slightly as time goes on. The up side to all of this is that I did it. I quit smoking and I feel amazing, right? No. I do not feel amazing. I feel lousy. I still cannot breathe, I am having more heart palpitations than ever before. My hands and feet are swollen. My anxiety level is through the roof. I am beyond exhausted, bordering on lethargic. When does the feeling of clear lungs, level mood, clear skin, and abounding energy come in?
I know that it is a good thing that I quit and I haven't lost hope in the positive effects of this decision, but this really is a drag (oh come on...that was good!). I will keep updating the progress, but I will always be honest. If quitting sucks, I'm going to tell you that quitting sucks. and right now...it sucks.
Sickie Selfie
Another thing it did, was completely obliterate any urge I had to smoke. OK, well not completely. I wanted to smoke, but I just knew it would either make me cough or make me sick, or make me cough so much that I would get sick. So for my entire vacation from work I didn't smoke. six days, no smoking, sick as a dog.
In the past, those first two weeks were the hardest part of quitting. I was half way through that period of time and I was still suffering a nasty cough. I pushed through on the idea that I might or might not quit if I made it through the two weeks, but I was going to get through them so I could get better. I kept my cigarettes. There was no decision or grand gesture of being finished with smoking. In fact it has been a month now and I still have a pack in my car and a pain my rain coat pocket.
This week (Week 5) has been the worst part. I am to the point that only people who quit smoking can fully relate to. I am currently disgusted by the smell of smoke on other people and the only way I can imagine to help that is to smoke, so I won't smell it anymore. This urge is stronger than the nicotine cravings for me. My husband smokes and when he comes in from the garage I want to leave the room. If he wants to kiss me, I want him to brush his teeth. I am tempted to put a bottle of mouthwash right next to the door. I can tell you who smokes as I pass them in the grocery store.
I expect all of this to pass and my hypersensitivity to the smell to ease slightly as time goes on. The up side to all of this is that I did it. I quit smoking and I feel amazing, right? No. I do not feel amazing. I feel lousy. I still cannot breathe, I am having more heart palpitations than ever before. My hands and feet are swollen. My anxiety level is through the roof. I am beyond exhausted, bordering on lethargic. When does the feeling of clear lungs, level mood, clear skin, and abounding energy come in?
I know that it is a good thing that I quit and I haven't lost hope in the positive effects of this decision, but this really is a drag (oh come on...that was good!). I will keep updating the progress, but I will always be honest. If quitting sucks, I'm going to tell you that quitting sucks. and right now...it sucks.
I'm really happy you are trying to quit smoking. Ash and Gen had horrible times trying to quit and it didn't happen overnight. I wish Steve would also quit-considering he had a heart scare a couple years ago I'm surprised he still does. Quitting totally sucks,but hang in there-I know you can do it!
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