Jessica Thinks

If you havent' had enough of me on Facebook, Tumblr and Twitter I'm sending you a copy of my stupid Christmas letter Our family hasn't grown - or shrunk this year We really are quite boring The events that occued this year Are sure to leave you snoring Steve just got a new job Managing projects in Europe and Asia I heard you had a great year too so this news shouldn't phase ya. We have two kids in high school now It's full of female drama Our son is a tough Marine Too cool to call his Mama Let's break down the girls because there are four, you know Each one as different as a flake of fallen snow (awwwwww!) Christa is our star student She's reading all the books She's a nerd and she's proud! And she's got the looks Kayla is a Rainbow Girl In more ways than one her face is pierced, she rocks rad hair she's beautiful and fun Lydia is the nosey one she HAS to know what you're up to She's a fan girl with ...

South Pole - I have written a few Holiday rants this year, that I decided against posting here, because I didn't want to seem all "Bah-humbugish." Mid-November I sank into an unrelenting panic.  I was worried that Christmas would be horrible for my family. I was worried that this year would be the year my kids would remember as "the worst Christmas ever," not only because of the lack of money, and therefore lack of presents, but because of my blackening mood and complete disinterest in the season as a whole. North Pole - After allowing a glimmer of this worry loose on my facebook page, I was awakened to the spirit of the holiday with a simple comment from my Mother-in-law. She offered to loan me money in order to do some shopping for the kids. Considering my In-laws are also my landlords, and they are usually the first ones to feel the effects of our brokeness, this was a very unexpected and sweet offer. I never took her up on it because, as luck would have it...

OK, I know that this may be considered TMI for some of you, but I am a totally whiney woman right now and I am going to complain about woman things, so scroll down if this will bother or offend you. from here on out I will refer to my menses as "Shark week" I am totally convinced that I am going to die from this shark week! Shark week hasn't been on for about 45-50 days and it made a comeback BIG TIME this week. Yesterday my left side felt like it was going to explode. I was doing full on Lamaze breathing to deal with the pain, then the sharks attacked and it was like a massacre. I thought that would be it. deal with the usual stuff for 5-7 days and then I'd return to normal, but today.... Oh my! Well the right side felt a little left out and so it decided to out-do the left side. 800mg Motrin barely dulled the pain. Heating pad all day helped a little more, but standing up is like torture. and it's like a super plus every 90 minutes type of day. Tomorrow bett...

You know what's annoying? When you are watching someone use the computer and you are trying to use your telepathic mind powers to get them to click RIGHT THERE, DUMB ASS! and they are putzing around clicking other shit all willie nillie and saying "I can't find it..." so you point at the right place on the monitor (knowing that this is another thing that is totally annoying), and they WAVE YOU AWAY. They know that you are right, but refuse to click that link now just to spite you... and they try to find another way to get there. All the while you are screaming inside your head "YOU F&$*ING IDIOT HOW DO YOU NOT SEE THAT?" So you turn away and ignore them for fear of popping a blood vessel in your eye by trying to use your brain to move their hand like some kind of wireless mouse and suddenly "Oh, I got it." Yep you got it genius! Annoying!

Everyone has pet peeves. but once you start making a list of things that annoy you, you may never stop. Even if you are some kind of Saint or yogi, who can rise above it all, there are still things that annoy you or you would have nothing to rise above. One day I was very annoyed about something and I explained it to a co-worker, and she actually finished my sentence while I was explaining what happened. This made me realize that I am not the only one who has experienced this specific annoyance. So I wrote it down. Not sure what I was going to do with it. Not surprisingly more things happened that were annoying to me and I decided I would just write them down as well. I've amassed a nice little collection of annoying situations that I would like to share with you. You may have been in some of these situations before, or not. Either way I think you will find them entertaining. I will stretch them out over a few posts so look out for the "It's so Annoying" titles if you...

I'm horrible at things like this, but I am going to try my hardest to stick with it this time. I have decided to Vlog every day in April, because it is apparently a thing. I will post a video to youtube every day this month. I will try to make them interesting but today's video is basically me talking about how I'm a flake and I started a day late because I can't so anything right. Tomorrow I am going to do a tag video. I will answer a bunch of questions posed by another youtuber, although since I don't know any other youtubers I will not forward the tag. I am trying to get started vlogging as a regular thing, but I have been too self conscious to post any of the videos I made. VEDA basically forces me to just get over it and post the damn videos already. After 29 days of posting every day I don't think I will be as nervous about posting. Wish me luck and if you watch the videos and like them, or subscribe to my channel it might encourage me to keep up with it. ...

To those of you who know me well, this post may seem a little strange because of it's religious subject matter, but I've been thinking about this for a few days now, and had to get it out there. I saw a news story about a shooting in an Amish community. One quote from the father of one of the victims really caught my attention and started a string of thoughts that I will try to explain here. This father, after losing his child basically said "I am thankful that the lord has the responsibility of judging his soul" (regarding the young shooter) To me this shows an ABSOLUTE trust in the lord. This man has no judgement of the boy who shot and killed his child. He trusts that the Lord will judge this kid, and feels thankful for the relief this gives him. I don't see this as meaning that this father is not saddened over the loss of his child, but it gives him comfort and takes the burden of judgment and hatred from him in a time when he should be focused on his mournin...

Man, I want to buy girl scout cookies more than ever this year. I thought the whole scout organization was run by people way out on the tip of the right wing. but I applaud the left of center stance the Colorado leaders are taking. You might already know that I am adamant about the fact that transgendered people are truly the sex they identify as, and not the sex they were born as. If a little girl wants to join the Girls Scouts, but she  happened to be born as a boy, then I say let her join. and the young girl who posted a video about boycotting girl scout cookies because of this is just full of hate and ignorance. A few things really get to me about this whole thing. One I don't believe this young girl came to this decision on her own. I think she was influenced by ignorant adults to go on this crusade against the cookies. Two How does telling people to Not but cookies help her cause? If she has a problem she should leave the girl scouts. If you don't believe what an organiza...

So here we go.... another year. What can I say about 2011? Well it was just as long as any other year, but I sure did accomplish a lot. I also failed a lot. so it all kind of evened out. I hope to tip those scales in the upcoming year.... towards the accomplishments of course. I have a few goals and ideas for this year, so I'm going to type them out here so I can come back and cry about the ones that didn't happen this time next year. (kind of like NaNoWriMo. lol) 1. Lose 25 lbs. This is totally doable. There are 52 weeks in a year so about 2 lbs a week will get me where I want to be. And that will put me back to where I was on my wedding day. That would be nice. 2. Read 50 books. OK so that's like a book a week and I'm already slacking, but I have decided that I am going to be forgiving with this one. If I read a 500 page book, that shit is counting as 2 books. Also I'm counting any chapter book, no matter how simple. I have a feeling there will be quite a few YA...